I first laid my eyes on Ariel back
in 2008. It was at a very rough shelter out in the very rough area of Mondragone,
in Southern Italy north of Naples. It was actually one of the worst shelters I
have ever seen, even until today. This was the first rescue mission AWL did, (Keegan,
Dennis, Rosa, Bruce, Kathryn, Ylva, David, Todd, Andreas, and others) this is
how six dogs came completely into my life. And actually, it is the genesis of
why I started to dream about opening a hospice.
The Italian Justice system
convicted the woman who ran this shelter for neglecting the dogs there; she had
40 dogs locked in outdoor cages. AWL
jumped in to try to find a better solution for the dogs there, rather than
going to government shelters. The volunteers and I were shocked by the smell
and sight of every cage. The dogs were standing in their own pee and poo,
drinking their own pee, food every six days. It was a nightmare. We brought a veterinarian with us, who made
vaccinations and examinations on all the dogs. We worked very hard for two days.
I stopped outside one cage and that
is when I saw Ariel together with several other dogs. I saw how crooked her right
front leg was. She was probably eight years old and had been in four different
shelters during her lifetime. Her leg had been broken in four different places
and had to heal by itself on a cold concrete floor. She painfully moved around
her pen only when she had to. Still, Ariel
did everything so I wouldn’t miss seeing her. She danced happily and howled. I
fell immediately in love with that strong loving lady’s face. Despite
everything there was so much love and affection inside her heart. What amazed
me the most was her longing for life, even after everything life had thrown at
her.
It took me one month to get her out
from the shelter together with the other five dogs. The law had to give me
permission to adopt them and that didn’t happen overnight. I found her best
friend isolated in another cage, that friend’s name was Nebbia. I asked why
Nebbia was isolated? They told me she was aggressive. Nebbia and I touched
noses and she told me it was a misunderstanding. I took Nebbia and Ariel out,
and that was one of the happiest moments in my life to feel the emotions inside
my heart and my stomach. All that love that flew between us. During my 20 years
in the rescue world I kept telling people that to rescue a life is one of the
most amazing things. I don’t ever see that thankfulness and cheerfulness in a human.
We always have to go for therapy for years and in many ways we are very bitter
towards life. Ariel and Nebbia stayed in
my home in Italy. They had the beautiful dining room- Salon for themselves, on their
soft beds. Even today, Nebbia has not shown
any aggressions, her label was a misunderstanding that made her sit for two
years in a small cage by herself.
When we moved from Italy up to
Germany, the transition was long, it took time to find a house that would fit
all my 15 dogs. Ariel and the other dogs had to stay at a dog hotel for a
little while. But Ariel didn’t’ do so very well there and she was moved to our
hospice. And I can assure you; she was so loved by all the volunteers. When they opened the door into her room her
tail went thump-thump-thump and she rolled on her back wanting everyone to
scratch her belly. She was groomed, and looked like a young puppy girl. There
were more than a few that, when seeing her for the first time, got very tear
eyed. They looked at her crooked leg, but at the same time from her, they felt
enormous love, not pity. She opened many
human hearts.
Last year we had her back x-rayed
since her way of walking put a lot of weight on her lower back. We could see
that her back would not hold very long. Ariel moved up to Germany and Nebbia
was so pleased to see her again. Ariel took the position as the Queen among my
pack. She loved food and she was the one who always told me at 15.00 to hurry
up, it was food time. She kept the pack stable, and had her bed that no one else
would touch. Ariel loved our floor heating, and her tail was always going
“thump-thump!” She was always smiling, yes she could smile and it never failed
to put a big smile on my own lips.
For a couple of weeks now, I have
felt her energy changing drastically. I cannot describe what I saw or felt, but
something was not as it used to be. That
very same day, I had two other dogs that were not doing well either, but the
interesting thing was, when it was Ariel’s turn to be seen by our wonderful
veterinarian Dr. Martina, I cried. I told our vet that I felt her internal organs
were shutting down, and her lower back was in pain. Ultra sound, blood tests were taken, and her
kidneys were shutting down. Ariel stopped eating, drank little water, and her
tail was making weaker “thump-thumps.” I knew that her biggest freedom was calling
her to come home. Even if I know her years together with us was amazing, a lot
of love, friends, compassionate AWL volunteers that did everything for her, my
heart didn’t want to let her go. At the same time to have done everything and
know we could help her in a “non-suffering” way over to the bridge was a true
gift, but still I didn’t want to. My friend came over to me and said she
understood my feelings. I looked at her with a question marked written all over
my face. How could she understand my pain, she didn’t even like dogs. Her smile
was compassionate when she explained that she understood the feelings. Her
mother had had Alzheimers and the pain to see someone you love slip away is
painful. One part wanted to let her
mother go peacefully over to the other side and the other side of her wanted to
keep her mother in her life.
We took Ariel’s bed and put it in
our living room were it was quieter but at the same time she could be with us
all. She could lay and look outside the big glass window. I informed the
children what was happening, and we talked about it. The children changed their
behavior around Ariel, calmer and plenty of compassion.
The pack of twelve dogs changed the
first day I noticed the difference in Ariel’s energies. The pack slowly walked
up to her and smelled her, and then backed away, it was their way of saying
goodbye.
I watched them and once again I tried
to be as brave as they, not to be afraid, to accept that this is a huge part of
life. Not to be afraid, to dare to love completely and live life to the
fullest, and when its time to go….go with the heart filled and content.
Ariel showed me that whatever life had
done to you, you did not have to forget, but you had to let it go and live to the
fullest every day. RIP
That’s Amore.